Change can be hard!

Change can be hard!

Part of being a good leader is knowing when to let go! It's learning to raise up amazing leaders under you that could one day take over where you left off and hopefully, even bring it to the next level! That doesn't make change any easier!

As our worship team, I am no longer part of, was practicing tonight, I felt a sadness. They were having so much fun and I missed being a part of that! (I can't escape it, it took place in my living room- Church planter problems!) I enjoy singing and worship and the camaraderie that our band has. I realize that the band has moved forward and has come to a really great place. They are growing and engaging more people in worship. New and younger talent is developing in ways they weren't able to with me in there.

I also just handed our church women's ministry to our associate pastor's wife. She has a passion for women's ministry and I know that she is the right woman for the job. At Thrive, God spoke to me and told me to let her take the ministry. I have full confidence that she will bring the ministry to the next level! I'm excited for what God is going to do through her!

The growing stage is hard! I know that as I am leaving these ministries, God is freeing me for other things. I know that I cannot move to greater heights when I am stuck where I used to be! Sometimes there is a gap between one thing and what's coming next. We just need to sit and wait on God to reveal it to us!

I can know these things in my head, but my heart still hurts sometimes.

But...I see it on the horizon! New things are coming! I have to look toward the future!
I can't wait to see what God has next!

Who me?

My nephew, who I watch during the day, didn't nap. My 3 year old is cranky and taunting her brothers relentlessly. My 9 year old hates math and cries "There is no way I can do this! I'm never going to use this!" My 10 year old is flaunting the fact that he already finished his school and "It's not that difficult!" Then the phone rings...

It is my presbyter's wife Betty. She asked me how I was doing, most likely a minor formality to lead up to her point. I however, saw a warm body on the line and unleashed all my troubles! I went on about how overwhelmed I am and how I don't know if I can do it all! I told her homeschooling was becoming less and less appealing.

I thought I was busy when I was a youth pastor's wife. As I church planter's wife, I move non-stop. It is not unusual for me to work from the time I wake up until 10:00 at night! I am planning the service, meeting with the core team, promoting the church (even at my kids' football games, yes- I have become that person), phone calls, connecting with people online, and all those other millions of things, plus running a homeschooling household! I don't think there are enough hours in the day sometimes!

She then shows reluctance and utters, "I don't know if I should even ask you then."

I reply, "Oh, It's always this way. What do you need Betty, I'll try to help."

She shocks me with, "I would like for you to be the women's guest speaker for our Sectional Ministry Life Seminar."

"Who, me?" I think I managed to get out. "I've never done that before."

She reassures me, "You will be great! I believe you can do it. I have read your blog. Just be real. You can talk about anything and use whatever format you like."

Had I not been reading Jodi Detrick's book The Jesus Hearted Woman, I may not have had the courage to even consider it. The first chapter, entitled These Shoes are Too Big, spoke about the author getting a call to become a District Woman's Director. She felt that she was not ready for the change, but didn't want to deny God's move in her life. She took that step of faith and said "Yes."

With my heart pounding, and my whole body shaking, I agreed to speak. This would be my first time speaking to women, and pastor's wives and women in active ministry no less! What could I have to offer these ladies? They should be teaching me!

God began to birth a message in me that I believe every woman can relate to, probably a lot of men as well.

Inadequacies. We can't let them stand in the way of what God is calling us to.

So, with a bit of fear still in me, I managed to speak that day. Although it wasn't perfect, it went over very well. I even got an offer to speak at a women's group in November!

When God call you, he equips you!

Embracing Martha

Saturday- not only church day, but watch my friends boys while her and her husband attend a wedding, Sunday- Kid's birthday party, Monday- church planning then crash, Tuesday- Men's Ministry dinner out and I have a Skype appointment, Wednesday- See Wicked with my Mother-in-law and sister-in-law, Thursday- Intern over for dinner and church meeting, Friday- new couple in the church over for dinner, Saturday- Church.......

My head is spinning with all the business lately! It's all good stuff, but boy do I need a break! Oh, that list is just the evenings! Not only all of the above, but also: home school my boys, keep up with my 3 year old, watch my 5 month old nephew, feed everyone, keep up with house chores, plan for church, etc..... and now my head is spinning again!

I don't know what the solution is, or if there even is one! God gave me a scripture to help pull me back to focus though...



     "As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."
Luke 10:38-42

Boy, do I feel like a Martha lately! There is all this work to be done and I better get to it or the ball will be dropped! Oh, but wait a minute...can't someone help me? Isn't there anyone that can step up?

I feel like at the stage of our new church plant I have to be the Martha. There are too many new Christians that need to be Mary, and just soak up all of God that they can! I need my Mary time too, but I am coming to realize that this has to be accomplished differently that it used to. I need to carve out more one on one time with my Savior. I need to teach my children to make time for their alone time with God and for them to allow me that time.

I must embrace Martha right now. After all, Martha was the one that invited Jesus to her house in the first place. She made sure everyone had something to eat and was happy. She gets a bad rap, but what a hard working, hospitable woman she was. She saw a need and she met it. Sure, she got overwhelmed and needed her sister's help, but don't we all get to that point! I can't imagine she liked the answer Jesus gave her very much.

When we cry out to God, the last thing we want to hear is that we are not getting our way! It at moments when we realize that he sees the bigger picture and knows what is best, that we grow! We see what we should be doing, not what we want to do.

I know that in the future I will have more workers. I know that as my children grow I will miss this stage where they need me so much! I will one day leave this constant Martha stage! ...Or will I?

Talent Required?

Being a church planter's wife sure stretches you! I am being used in ways I never would have thought. Anyone that has known me for any length of time would be shocked to hear what I am doing now!

I am now the worship leader! (While our worship leader recovers from giving birth to her new son, a.k.a. my adorable nephew.) I have never been known as a great singer. In fact I was quite the opposite growing up. Thank God that when there is a need He provides the talent where it was lacking! I have improved so much and can actually carry a tune. Believe it or not, a few people have even said I have a beautiful voice! Praise God he provides!

It makes me wonder...is talent required? Or does God honor you stepping out in faith, trusting that He will make it work? I'm really not sure. Maybe it's a little bit of both.

There is so much to learn on the church planting adventure! I can't believe all the things that I never even thought about! In the beginning stages, there's not a whole lot of people besides your family. I knew that in my head, but the reality still hits hard.

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9

At times it can seem discouraging and overwhelming! But can not loose heart! Remember God's call for your city! Meditate on the promise he has given you! He will provide if we stay faithful!



I had to add a picture of my new nephew Saxon!

Not Alone

This morning as I was reading the Bible these verses stuck out to me.

“I thank God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:3-6

It made me so grateful for all the people God has placed in my life at this time! I am so thankful for the team God has given us for Salt Church! I am blessed by all of my home school mom friends that serve the Lord as they teach their children! I am excited about all the new ministry ladies I am meeting and connecting with!

I know I need these ladies in my life. I need people to encourage me when I feel weak. To pray with me when I have to make the second trip to the ER in a week. (Everyone is fine now.) I need to hear their stories and know that they struggle like I do.

I know that there is no way that I could sustain this church plant adventure with out knowing there are others partnering with me across the country. At times you can feel like you're all alone. You feel lost in this church pioneering venture. It's difficult to navigate the uncharted waters.

I find such comfort in the words of the verse "..pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel.."  I am in partnership with the body of Christ. I am not alone in this adventure!

It is such a blessing to have church planters across the country as a part of that support! Last spring I was a part of a VCG (Virtual Community Group) through Leading and Loving It . This fall I am blessed to lead a new community of planters' wives with them. It so so amazing to share with others that are going through the same things you are going through.

I know that God has a plan for my church! I know that He will see it through. (Now if only I could remember that in the midst of the zeros in my checking account and the car troubles.) Paul says "be confident of this, that he who began a good work...will carry it on to completion"! Sometimes it's hard to be confident but I must trust in my calling! He who has called me will carry me through!

Lessons on Worry

The past few weeks have been quite hard financially for this little church planting family! I had become quite worried about how we going to afford to live. My cupboards are getting very bare! I was concerned and started to think about job possibilities. This church planting business is hard stuff, especially on your finances! However; hard things are worth doing!

God spoke to me today through my kids devotional. I honestly wanted to skip it today because I just wanted to get their school work finished so I could move on to other pressing household issues. (Not to mention, this homeschooling mama is ready for summer!) We opened up their Keys for Kids book and it was based on Luke 12:22-31. My heart was opened as my sweet Liam began reading...

"Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens; They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well." Luke 12:22-31

There is something so eye opening about hearing God's word read by your child. Through his voice God was speaking to me so clearly! He knows that we need food. He knows that I am stressed! I need to turn it over to him and seek his kingdom first! He will provide if I serve his kingdom! Then, God gave me an opportunity....

There is a man that frequently comes by our house looking for the my husband. He found out he was a pastor about a year ago. He comes by to ask for prayer and to talk things out, but mostly for financial help. We're not always able to give him money, but we usually send him with some food. Today he knocked on my door. In the past, I haven't opened if my husband wasn't home. I opened it today and just that was a blessing to him. He said it made him feel human. So many people, including myself, have ignored his knocking. He needed $12.86 to finish paying for his son's graduation clothes. I told him things were so tight right now. I said my pantry is just about bare and I don't think I really have anything. God spoke to my heart and I told him to wait. I told him I would go check and see if I had any cash (I thought I had maybe $4). I went to my wallet and I had $13 to give him! I told him God was looking out for both of us today! I prayed that God would multiply both of our finances. I shared the about devotional with him.

In providing for that man I was being God's hands and doing the work of his kingdom! God provides. Later today we checked our bank and someone had donated $400 into our account! God is faithful!

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God" Philippians 4:6

God hears our prayers and worries. My boys and I now know what to do when we are worried. Thank God for what we do have, voice our worries and fears to God, then let go and let him take it! He wants what's best and he will see us through!

Church Planting Whirlwind

Well, it's been too long since I wrote. My life has been in the whirlwind of church planting! What an adventure we are going to have with Salt Church!

I never realized all the legal stuff you have to deal with. We have been getting insurance, filling for non-profit status, incorporating, waiting on approval from the Assemblies of God -which we just recieved (our church fellowship), and so much more! We are learning so much!

We have started having our core team meetings for Salt in our living room (which means a lot more cleaning!).  It has been going well and by the grace of God our team has been growing. We are still awaiting God to send us a childrens' director and someone with pastoral experience!

I have been learning to stretch our dollars even more! I am already an extreme couponer wanna be, but now it is a necessity. I have learned to be much more creative with our meals. We have been eating a lot more soups because of their meat stretching abilities!

We are about to enter into the adventure of fundraising! In our fellowship, there is a 30,000 dollar matching grant that we could desperately use to make this church a success! We are in the midst of building a website, writing support letters, and planning fundraisers! God has blessed us with many talented people around us that have been helping us pull everything together.

All this, plus homeschooling my children, makes for little time to myself! I have not had time to blog. I hope to get to it more often!